Half of What I Used to Be
by Shadow Knight2
Summary: non compos mentis (n): one devoid of reason, either by nature or from accident. . . . . Someone has been murdered. . but who? And who did it? -Chapter 7 is up. -COMPLETE-
1. Shame

Half of What I Used to Be  
  
Shadow Knight  
  
Chapter 1: Shame  
  
Disclaimer: I never owned the wonderful Ranma 1/2 show and I never will.  
  
~  
  
Well, this was a new idea. Although I know I probably shouldn't start a new story since I'm battling with Broken, Dancing in the Dark, Forsaken Memories (slowly dying. . . ), and Snow White and the Seven Cursed (slowly dying also. . . ).  
  
ANYWAYS- My idea was to create a story where suppose one of the Ranma gang did something horrible. . .to another person. This person didn't do it all on their own though. They had a little push.  
  
Plus there's an insanity factor.  
  
NOTE: P.O.V.'s will focus on the predator. But in this story you have to figure out who the victim and the predator are. And probably most importantly. . . why?  
  
Interested? I hope so.  
  
Hope you enjoy the fic. ^_^  
  
~  
  
I. . I didn't mean to do it.  
  
It was just an accident. . . just an accident. . . .  
  
When I did it. . . I. . . was being rash. . .  
  
It was all. . . just an accident. . . .  
  
God save my soul. . . .I had committed a horrible sin. . .  
  
~  
  
Opening my eyes slowly, they seemed dreadfully heavy. Cheerful sunlight streamed through my window and burned my eyes like acid. A grimace harrowed my features.  
  
I hated it.  
  
Looking down at my pale hands I didn't see the familiar appendages I had come to know, I saw something foreign to me. My skin seemed darkened with sin. My fingers started to twitch erratically, gaining a life of their own. Words began ushering forth in my mind with frantic whispers.  
  
. . . . .Dirty hands. . . Dirty. . . So dirty. . . had to get them clean. . . they were so filthy. . .  
  
. . . . . .Scratch. . . scratch it off. . . . Scratch off the filth. . . scratch off the dirty skin. . . be clean. . . scratch it off. . .  
  
. . . . They're still dirty. . . they wont become clean. . . .sinful hands. . . stained. . . oh so dirty. . . .  
  
I stopped scratching. No, . . . I couldn't break down like this. Then they'd all know what I did. They'd know I wasn't being good.  
  
Stepping out of my bed, I carefully folded the sheets back onto my mattress in a neat pile. I couldn't change my habits. . . they'd notice . . . .  
  
Then I moved to my face. As I saw myself in the dim mirror near my bed, I saw dark rings under my eyes, almost as if two black half circles. They seemed to sink into my face. My cheeks were pale and shallow, skin tight over my bones. My hair was a tangled mess as I brushed it out.  
  
I had to work on my face now. . . they couldn't see that I was a scared demon. . . .  
  
Sneaking to the bathroom stealthily, I lathered my hands in the cheap bar of soap lying on the counter. As bubbles foamed around my hands, I wondered if just for a moment. . . the soap could wash away the dirt on my hands. . . the filth. . . .  
  
Reaching up to my dismal eyes, I tried vainly to scrub away at the shallow dips beneath my eyes. I tried to erase the darkened frown on my face. With a sigh, I stared at the person in the mirror. It was someone I couldn't recognize. Someone very naughty. . .so. . .naughty. . . .  
  
I pinched and scrubbed roughly at my cheeks in several spots, trying to regain some color in them. Looking back at myself, I could see a person that wasn't such a ghoul anymore. . . but still. . . no good.  
  
Grabbing a jacket from my closet, I crept down the stairs, a fake smile plastered on my face. It was all an act, all to prevent me from breaking down. To stop them from seeing my sweaty palms and nervous eyes.  
  
To stop them from seeing whom I really was now. . .  
  
They couldn't see that I had changed. . .  
  
And that I had done something bad.  
  
I didn't mean to do it. . . but I did it anyways.  
  
Now as I thought about it more. . . a grin grew on my face.  
  
I couldn't stop once I started. . . . I had to do it.  
  
But I didn't worry about it. No. . .not about them.  
  
They wouldn't find out what I had done. . . .  
  
Because they wouldn't find the corpse.  
  
~  
  
Well. . . interesting? I hope so. BIG NOTE FOR READERS: In each chapter following there will be one person of the Ranma gang knocked off the list of suspects and such. You'll have to figure out who's knocked off by the clues provided.  
  
Hope you guys enjoyed it. I know I'm gonna have fun with this one. ^_^  
  
Please be nice and review.  
  
Thanx.  
  
Ciao. ^_~ 


	2. Anxiety

Half of What I Used to Be  
  
Shadow Knight  
  
Chapter 2: Anxiety  
  
Disclaimer: No.  
  
~  
  
Wow. . . I'm just shooting out these chapters now. . . Cool. ^_^ Well, I've updated Dancing in the Dark and Broken and now this one. I'll probably shoot out another one soon. Maybe. ^_^  
  
_NOTE_: Here's your first clue!  
  
~  
  
The sky looked a bit darker than usual today. Or perhaps that was my attitude? I couldn't truly tell the difference. My mind was too frenzied and scrambled to even care.  
  
This morning I had nearly lost myself in the frantic thoughts of my mind. Staring down at my hands, I saw only bloodstained hands. No one else would see, but I knew. . . . yes. . . I knew what had happened. Was it right?  
  
No. . . .  
  
But I liked it. . . ..  
  
It caused the adrenaline to pump in my veins, coursing through my body. . . . It was exhilarating!  
  
. . . . Now the rush was over. . .  
  
Now I had to deal with the consequences for what I had done. . . .  
  
I felt a grin crack along my face.  
  
. . . . But it sure had been fun. . . .  
  
. . . Killing. . .  
  
~  
  
As I passed along the street, vendors threw their arms, waving at all customers to come and taste "this sweet delicacy," or sample some of their "home remedy." It was all a load of bull, but no one cared. They moved along like herds of cattle, stirring as one group.  
  
All of them. . . stupid. . .  
  
Unfortunately, I did have to stop and pick up some things and mingle with these droning fools. I quickly shoved my way here and there, trying not to touch people. There was something in my heart that scared me. I was afraid of touching them.  
  
If I did. . . they might figure out what I did. . . .  
  
Suddenly the crowd seemed like a suffocating presence, squeezing at me from all sides. My palms began to grow clammy as I flicked my eyes back and forth at the crowd, desperately trying to get away. . . I had to get away. . . .  
  
I had to get out!. . . . . No. . . I had to stop. . . I wasn't being good. . . .  
  
Closing my eyes, I took several deep breaths. The air filtered in my lungs like smoke, poisoning and yet intoxicating. I coughed a few times, pushing out the bad air. Looking around, I looked for someone smoking.  
  
But I saw no one. . . .Why was the air so bad? Why did it taste like poison on my lips?  
  
Trying to ignore the noxious fumes in the air, I made my way further into the crowd, searching for the vegetable stands. There they were! Quickly I dashed to the stand, desperate to get this over with and get rid of the phobia that consumed me with maddening pulses. Picking carefully among some mushrooms, I picked a few deftly from the pile and stuffed them jerkily into a bag.  
  
Looking up, I saw the vendor eyeing me warily. Stupid bastard, I thought, gathering my things, stop staring at me and do your stupid work. No. . . .he was staring at me because of my movements. . .wasn't he? Moving my eyes from his questioning face, I stared down at my hand that continued to twitch and pick at the bunch of mushrooms.  
  
Watching it, I felt a sudden throng of fear swell inside me. It. . . it was moving on its own. . . .  
  
Hands don't move on their own. . . .They had to be controlled. . . .  
  
Then why was mine moving. . . by itself?  
  
No! I was letting it get to me! I grabbed my right hand with my left and forcibly shoved it away from the mushrooms. Pocketing it, I grabbed my bag and walked calmly up to the vendor. I placed my bag in front of him and mumbled a small word about "hand spasms" and "I forgot my medicine."  
  
He nodded slowly as if acknowledging what I said and turned to ring up the price. I didn't need to be a genius to see that he didn't believe me. I didn't give a shit really. Screw him if he didn't believe my story, I didn't truly care.  
  
"Oh my! Well, hello. I haven't seen you in a while."  
  
The hairs on the back of my neck stood high as I heard the soft sing-song voice behind me. Turning curtly, I felt my eyes widen and my heart pound against my chest. It hurt. . . It hurt bad. . .  
  
Clenching fingers to my palms, I forced a crooked grin on my face and smiled at her. Her sunny face gleamed back at me like a predatory hawk. A trickle of sweat ran down my forehead. I had to get away from her. . . . She was. . . She was trying to find me out!  
  
"Hello, Tendo-san. I'm. . .I'm sad to in. . inform you, but I must be going. I don't . . . don't have time to chat."  
  
Her soft eyes seemed to pierce through me, setting a flame of warning through me. Vile bitch. . . . she was trying to make me break. . . She was trying to crack my fortified wall. . .  
  
"I'm sad to here that. Maybe I'll see you around here some other time. Until then, good-by."  
  
Gathering my change from the vendor I gave her a quick smile and bowed. "Until then."  
  
Snatching my bag, I hurried out of the shopping area, my breath coming out in short gasps. Clutching a hand to my face, I wiped away the sweat and tried to calm down. My heart still thundered against my chest. I walked slowly toward a darkened alley. Covered by the darkness, I leaned against the wall and closed my eyes.  
  
Soon my legs gave out from under me and I slid downwards toward the grimy ground. "Dammit," I muttered to myself, "I've got to be more careful."  
  
Suddenly, I felt a small plop smack me lightly on my nose. Looking up, I put my dirtied hands up and felt several more small smacks. A dark cloud swirled in the sky and dropped its load.  
  
So. . . .it's raining. . . . Filthy water. . . Yes. . . very filthy. . . .So much like my hands. . . .  
  
Bringing my hands to my face, I closed my eyes and licked the water in my palms.  
  
Very dirty. . . . but very good. . . . . .Looked bad. . . . but it tasted wonderful. . . ..  
  
So much like me. . . . .  
  
~  
  
That night as I lay in my bed, eyes wide open, I stared at my ceiling. I never noticed how it had looked. Most interesting. . . . .  
  
Darkness surrounded me in my small room. But I didn't mind. . . The darkness was very comforting. . . .It was like an old friend. . . . I thrived in it. ..  
  
Suddenly, I heard a faint scream pierce the night's silence like a knife. It was far, but not too far. . . . My lips turned up in a grin.  
  
They must have found it. . . the corpse.  
  
Oh well, I thought, They would've found it sooner or later. I suppose the rain pushed the body up a few feet from the ground.  
  
Smiling to myself, I closed my eyes and smiled deeper as I heard several more horrified cry slice the silence in half.  
  
I wonder if they've found the broken fingers. . . .  
  
Maybe they first saw the bashed skull. . ..  
  
Or perhaps the missing eyeless sockets. . . .  
  
With a pleasant grin on my face, I felt sleep overtake me as the pained wails soared through the air and rock me to sleep like a gentle lullaby.  
  
~  
  
Yikes. That was getting a little TOO creepy for me. Do you think I should stop? I haven't done one this creepy before. . . .  
  
Well you tell me in your nice little reviews, hmm?  
  
Anywho, for those of you reading, I really hope you can guess who the killer found and who gets knocked off the list of suspects AND victims. If you REALLY can't figure it out, I'll tell you in my notes in the next chapter. I can't mention names as the clues. They come in either distinct possessions, phrases, or actions that are common to the character.  
  
Well, that's the end of that.  
  
Ciao. ^_~  
  
P.S. TerraEpon-Your assumption is absolutely. . . . . . . WRONG!!! 


	3. Lust

Half of What I Used to Be  
  
Shadow Knight  
  
Chapter 3: Lust  
  
Disclaimer: This is the last disclaimer you'll see me writing for this story. I've been getting so annoyed by these, so here it is: I do not own Ranma 1/2, the story originates from the brilliant mind of Rumiko Takahashi. The anime production. . . I don't know. So there. :P  
  
_NOTE_: NEXT CLUE IS APPEARING! ANSWER TO LAST ONE AT BOTTOM.  
  
~  
  
What a horrible sin I've committed. . . .  
  
Worthy of being thrown into the darkest of hells. . . . .  
  
. . . . But why do I still enjoy it?  
  
~  
  
Ah. . . .what a wonderful dream. . . It was more like a memory really. . . . So nice. . . So deliciously wicked. . .  
  
My hands around that pale neck. . . .wonderful  
  
Those eyes. . . so wide with fear. . . lovely  
  
Blood dripping on my fingers. . . . . fantastic  
  
Oh. . . so very nice. . . . The way the hot blood burned on my skin . . . . enticing my own to boil inside me with excitement. The adrenaline pulsating under my skin, ripping through my muscles with a terrifying force. . . .  
  
Deliciously exquisite.  
  
Opening my eyes, I felt a smile tug at my lips. As silence swept through my room, I remembered the screams that had ripped through the sky last night, slicing through the silence.  
  
I had never heard such a wonderful sound.  
  
As I folded my blanket and slipped into my clothes, I hummed merrily. It was going to be a wonderful day, watching the pain. . . . the suffering. . . .  
  
How very beautiful it would be. . .  
  
As I reached into my pocket, I felt something prickle against my finger. Withdrawing it, I grinned.  
  
Oh my. . . . I mustn't leave that for any prying eyes to see. . .  
  
I smiled as I twisted the smooth handle in my hand. I had better clean off the blood. . . or else it would stain. . . . yes. . . get very. . . very dirty. . . . So much like my hands. . . .  
  
Turning it carefully in my hands, I wiped the layer of crimson away onto a small tissue.  
  
Yes. . . yes. . . . wipe the blood away. . . . Must look clean. . . yes. . . must be very clean. . . .  
  
Smirking, I put it back in my pocket.  
  
I never realized. . . . blades were so much fun. . . . .  
  
~  
  
It was raining again today.  
  
As the cold drops landed on my skin. . . it felt nice. . . So cold and stinging. . . like sharp needles on my skin. This pain. . . it was nice.  
  
Walking down the street, I looked to see the tell tale signs. My eyes flicked about wildly. I think I was beginning to enjoy this. . . . this. . . fear. . .  
  
People glancing about nervously . . . . .  
  
Children clutching their mothers tightly . . . . .  
  
Police prowling the street like rats . . . . . .  
  
Quite a scene indeed. A happy purr rumbled through me briefly, vibrating my frame. This was better than I expected. This fear. . . . so wonderful. . . . so. . . . tasty. . .  
  
I heard small whispers passing by as I walked along the fretting crowds of people, trying to avoid touching them.  
  
". . . . said they found a body. . . ."  
  
" . . . . stabbed and bashed in the skull, what a horrible way to die . . . ."  
  
". . dissected . . like an animal . . .bits of flesh and body parts missing . . ."  
  
". . . they said the rain yesterday rose the body out of the ground. . ."  
  
". . . . buried near the river . . . ."  
  
Slipping a false mask over my grinning face, I strolled further through the crowds. I could feel the fear swelling through the crowd, so close to the bursting point.  
  
Against my chest, I could feel my heart beating wildly against my chest, pounding. . . harder. . . harder. . . .  
  
What a rush! What a feeling! That fear. . that anxiety. . . it was sweet . . . so bittersweet on my lips. . . . It tasted almost like candy. It burned through me like a drug, a dark ecstasy soaring through me, ripping into my every fiber of my being. It was exhilarating! It was. . . . no. . .no!  
  
No, dammit!  
  
Ducking into an alley, I tried to contain the thrill going through me.  
  
I had to stop. . . yes. . . . I couldn't let myself get carried away. . . No I must be good. . . very good. . . . I had to wait. . . . yes. . . I would have to wait. . . Must not let them see me like this. . .  
  
Must not let them see me being bad. . . .  
  
Stretching my cheeks back, my lips pulled into a large grin, thinning across my teeth.  
  
No. . . No one should see me like this. I tucked the knife deeper into my pocket. No. . . I had to be calm. Yes. . . . calm. . . . . I couldn't be naughty.  
  
Not yet at least. . .  
  
In my pocket, I felt my fingers twitch excitedly, taking a life of their own as they played with the knife, curling tightly around the handle. Slowly my hand dragged the knife out of my pocket. . .  
  
No!  
  
Shoving my left hand back into the pocket with my right, I forced it to release the knife. Taking my left hand in my right, I gazed at it. "You're being naughty," I mumbled to my left hand  
  
Squeezed in my right, my left hand jerked in spasmodic movements. After a little bit it stopped and I let it go. "Very good," I purred to myself.  
  
Stepping back into the street, I put my intangible mask back on. I mustn't get carried away. . . . Not like that again. Or they would see I was being very bad. . . .  
  
No. . . I had to contain the lust for this fear. . .  
  
My steps became short and precise as I walked down the street, heading nowhere in particular. It was amusing. . ., I thought with an inward grin, I hadn't been like this before. . . . I had been quite different indeed.  
  
But really. . . .  
  
. . . the taste of fear became addicting.  
  
~  
  
The sun had disappeared behind the clouds now. It was dark.  
  
Wonderful.  
  
Now breathing in the fall's crisp air, I wondered about the streets. Escaping from my room unnoticed was inconceivably easy now. . . .  
  
I had to escape. . . . Out of that hell hole.  
  
Staying there, I would only be surrounded by idiots. So annoying they were. . . . If I hadn't gotten out, I may have lost it and had a little. . . mistake with one of them. . .  
  
Just thinking about running my blade across their necks brought a wicked grin on my face.  
  
Yes. . . so much blood. . . . So beautiful. . . . . The best part was seeing them flounder about, trying to call out as they choke on their own accursed blood. . . .  
  
Very amusing. . .  
  
Suddenly I heard a strangled cry. Fear suddenly latched onto my heart and every one of my nerves stood on end. Quickly looking for cover, I hid behind a car, listening for footsteps.  
  
Hearing none, I stepped out cautiously. . . oh yes. . . very cautiously. . . . For some reason, I felt the cry sounded familiar. Stepping in line with the shadows on the pavement, I crept closer to the source of the voice.  
  
Pressing my back into the shadows, I imagined myself being draped with a cover, a cloak, of darkness. With all the darkness around me, I felt calmed.  
  
My eyes suddenly flicked upward wildly as I heard another muffled yell. There! In the park. . . yes. . . a person. . . .  
  
Creeping stealthily along, I let my drape of shadows cover me. Hopping the small metal fence surrounding the park, I slithered closer, deeper into the park and behind a thick wall of vegetation.  
  
From behind my botched wall of tree branches and shrubs, I saw a figure, crying out as it struck out at a tree. Something metal flashed in its hand. A knife? Small stirrings of fear fluttered in my stomach.  
  
Looking closer, I saw a small hammer. . . . very small. . . but powerful enough to shake leaves from the tree as it smacked against it.  
  
Could be quite harmful. . . .  
  
As a cloud stretched past the moon, small ivory beams flickered through the treetops. Now illuminated I could see a young man. . . yes. . . I recognized him. . . The damn bastard.  
  
His eyes were wide with a mad lunacy. . . . . reminded me of someone, I thought with a grin. He reached back with his hammer and struck at the tree. . no. . . something _on_ the tree. . . . . .  
  
Interesting. . . . Very. . . interesting. . .  
  
I peered closer. There was a. . . .doll. . . .  
  
It was small and made of straw. Protruding from the straw chest was a metal spike. As I watched, I noticed that the pathetic boy was crying. Pearly tears streamed down his cheeks.  
  
"Why?! Why wont you come to me?!," he screamed to no one in particular, clutching his head as if in pain.  
  
With another strangled cry he pounded at the spike, driving it deeper and deeper into the tree. He collapsed against the tree and sobbed.  
  
Pathetic.  
  
A wicked thought suddenly came into mind. . . . Slit his neck. . . . a voice whispered. . . . Cut off that incessant babbling tongue. . . . Make him suffer. . . . slowly. . . .  
  
Grinning at the thoughts, I had to force myself to stop. No. . . . this was out in the open. . . I'd get caught. . . . .  
  
I turned back and watched as he screamed into the ground, grinding his fist into the dirt. His cries were muffled as he sobbed though. . . . Stupid little shit. . .  
  
Quietly, I slipped back onto the street and headed back home, disgusted. If this is what I had to run into, I might as well not sneak out anymore.  
  
They were all damnable. . . idiotic bastards. I hated them all.  
  
~  
  
Hmm. . . I guess this murderer has a little bit of an anger problem, no? Ah well. I'm just glad to get done with this chapter. I'm beginning to get a head ache, so I'll make this short.  
  
If you didn't get the last clue, it is indeed Kasumi who the murderer talked to. I prefer not to reveal anything to you until possibly at the end, but if some of you REALLY couldn't guess, here's the answer. If you have objections to me just letting you know, then tell me. I don't mind one bit.  
  
Also, that little encounter was another clue. If you can't figure it out, then I guess you don't know the Ranma 1/2 series very well. I tried to avoid the person's "head attire" so as to not just blatantly give it away.  
  
Until next time,  
  
Ciao. ^_~  
  
P.S. PRETTY, PRETTY, PRETTY PLEASE REVIEW! Believe me, reading all your guesses, or just criticism and compliments, is quite encouraging and enjoyable. Feel free to speculate. And for those who keep their guesses to themselves, um. . . keep them to yourselves as you please. :P 


	4. Blood

Half of What I Used to Be  
  
Shadow Knight  
  
Chapter 4: Blood  
  
Disclaimer: Okay, I lied. I don't own it.  
  
~  
  
Falling like crimson tears. . .  
  
That beautiful dripping scarlet. . .  
  
Staining my hands in deepest of sins. . .  
  
Tainting my tongue with fleshly blood. . .  
  
Oh how sweet and enticing.  
  
~  
  
NOTE: NEXT CLUE UP! P.S. This can be based on either the anime or manga, or both together. The range of characters doesn't span VERY wide at all for this story, so if you're thinking it's someone like Shinnosuke or something, cross that off. Stick to basically people in Nermia.  
  
~  
  
They identified the body today. . .  
  
As if I didn't know.  
  
I held the newspaper in my hand as I walked outside. My eyes ran down the pages eagerly, eating up each delectably gory detail that the journalists were allowed to put in:  
  
"According to the police coroner, the victim's body was mutilated. The murder was very precise and meticulous in the details of dissection. 'In terms of practice,' the coroner replied, 'this was the work of a person who took quite a bit of time in planning and execution of the hideous deed. Unbelievably precise.'  
  
Based on information granted, the cause of death was probably the strangest of all the violence: Strangled.  
  
With all the different types of mutilations and obscenities performed on the body, this simple, yet, brutal procedure was labeled strangely odd. Different cuts and incisions made in the flesh, hair yanked from the roots, broken and missing body parts. . . . yet. . . the cause of death was by simple strangling.  
  
Whether the mutilations to the body were performed before or after the initial death of the victim is unsure at this moment, but the police will nevertheless be searching for this crazed kille-"  
  
The paper's characters were suddenly morphed as I twisted the paper angrily in my fist. My teeth clamped tightly together as I tossed the paper into a trashcan with a snarl. Who did they think they were dealing with?! I was no common, crazed lunatic!  
  
No. . . I had every reason to kill. . . not just for dark pleasures. .  
  
The little idiot deserved to die. What I had done was being nice. . .oh. . . I could do worse. . .much. . much worse. . .  
  
Looking up, I saw a clock hanging in a nearby shop. 2:00. Ah yes,. . . I better be going. . . mustn't be late. ..  
  
With a grin, I pulled my black coat tighter over my clothes and combed my hair into place with my pale fingers. My shoes clacking along the sidewalk, I strode calmly as I hid the laughing devil inside me.  
  
Naughty, but pleasurable thoughts ran through my brain. It sent a rupturing ripple of sensual happiness through me.  
  
Oh how very, very naughty I was being. I must be better.  
  
After all, I couldn't look too happy where I was going.  
  
No one was happy. . . at a funeral.  
  
~  
  
My eyes danced over the ebony clothes fluttering in the cold wind. Pale faces were numerous in the gloomy cloud, faces torn with tears. A sniffling and low moaning ran rampant.  
  
How foolish they were! Crying over the little idiot! And yet. . .their agony was oddly soothing and wonderful.  
  
Their cries sent chills down my spine as a strange ecstasy ran through my body. My blood boiled inside my veins with a whispering of erotic desires and scorched my skin. Oh! Hands twitching, I contained my fingers and closing my eyes I stopped and breathed in deeply.  
  
No. . . I couldn't. . . Stop! I. . .Oh! What pleasure! What euphoria! I drank in the pain and suffering with a hunger I thought I never had! It tasted so sweet on my lips! My heart beat against my chest madly as adrenalin coursed through me like a drug.  
  
Oh damn this blissful darkness!. . . I had to contain it! I bit the flesh of my bottom lip sharply, drawing forth a small blossom of blood in my mouth.  
  
This. . this beast that ran rampant through me had to be caged!  
  
Nails digging into my palms, I tried to distract myself from the pleasure. Slowly, I gained control over my drugged senses, the pain in my lip becoming eminent.  
  
Carefully watching the crowd, I licked my bottom lip with slow pleasure.  
  
The mask of sympathy was slipped on easily as I slipped closer within the shivering crowd. I nodded with false condolence, careful not to touch any of the dirty, sniveling souls. The previous source of pleasure suddenly became putrid and disgusting.  
  
How revolting these people were! If they had even a sliver of what their "lost beloved" truly was, they too would be burning with the urge to kill.  
  
Being a bit late. . and perhaps a bit too caught up in my fantastic delights. . . , I missed a few lines that were spoken. But I caught the last few.  
  
". . . was a wonderful person. Never meant anyone any harm. . . It is sad that we have lost this pure soul. May this poor soul rest in peace."  
  
The mourners seemed to echo in a dead voice after him. "Rest in peace. . ."  
  
A few more roses were tossed into the hole, littering the glossy surface of the coffin lid. It was silent as a few left, some staying.  
  
Yes. . . I thought silently with a fervent urgency. . . leave. . .leave. . .  
  
Suddenly a man stepped from the crowd. At the moment I saw his well- tailored clothes, I knew who the bastard was. Yes, I knew that rich bastard. I couldn't stand him.  
  
To others, he may appear a chivalrous and mournful character, but I knew his lies. The fool thought himself noble, but he was just a thick-headed idiot.  
  
His jacket lapels flapping in the bitter wind, he came forth and pulled a long, wooden weapon from his side. A bokken. . . With a deep breath, he bent to his knees and let the bokken slide from his fingers and hit the coffin, thudding dully.  
  
Stepping back, his eyes looked wet.  
  
I hated fake people.  
  
If he was alone with me, he wouldn't last very long. First his "poetical" tongue would go, a quick slice would do away with that. . . Oh yes. . . Then his eyes, gorged and removed. . .What fun that would be!. . . Oh! But it certainly would be a bloody mess wouldn't it?! Yes. . . that would attract too many eyes. . . Naughtiness would need chastisement. . .  
  
And oh. . . how naughty I was being! No, that wouldn't be very good. . . no. . .  
  
Very naughty indeed. . .  
  
Suddenly, the man leading the service bowed deeply, others following with closed eyes in respect. Ha! Damn them, it didn't matter. If they wanted to give their last sympathies to the bastard, so be it.  
  
After the last members left in a moaning crowd, a beautiful chorus of pure agony and despair. . . Beautiful to the ears. . .  
  
With the mourners gone, I was now completely alone. . . .  
  
An angry form began forming on my face as I crept closer to the coffin. This so called "innocent soul" had been close to destroying me. The little idiot was about to expose me, always trying to get more out of me. I let myself down into the open grave. Bending down, I wrapped my fingers around the top edges and open the casket top. There laid the fool, a mutilated shell.  
  
My eyes ran hungrily down the broken stitches, freshly sewn. The black thread was crusted with dried blood, the color of rust. A broken smile, hastily sewn together, smiled up at me. Fake strands of hair laid strewn about on the silken lining of the coffin. The clothes covered up most of the missing pieces of flesh or the large gashes, but not the face.  
  
Reaching down, I couldn't resist any longer, and touched the closed eyelids. They slid underneath my touch. Even before the synthetic material brushed against my fingers, I knew the eyelids were fake.  
  
After all, . . . those were some of the first things to go.  
  
Grasping one eyelid, I lifted it up with morbid curiosity. A black hole glared against the pale skin of the face enabling me to see inside. I smiled as the eyelid slipped from my grasp and snapped shut.  
  
So they didn't replace the eyes. . . Good. . good. .  
  
My eyes ran silently down the face, absorbing every cut stitched up, every bruise disguised with corpse makeup, every burn cleverly hidden. . .  
  
Leaning down, I reached my hand underneath the thin neck and lifted the body toward me slightly. The corpse makeup glistened in the pale sunlight. Deftly, I swept my fingers along the cold face. Then, closing my eyes, I bent down and met my lips with the corpse's.  
  
A muffled laugh escaped my lips as the stitches tickles my face.  
  
Drawing back, I smiled darkly. "The thought of you dead always turned me on. . ."  
  
Withdrawing my hands, I let the body fall back into the coffin. Jumping back out of the hole, the lid slammed shut. My feet planted on the edge, I dug into my pocket and withdrew my knife. I looked at it for a second, admiring its tarnished surface, crusted with blood. Then, I threw it at the coffin, letting it clatter noisily on the surface.  
  
"Good-bye, you damn fool."  
  
Turning, I walked off from the funeral grounds, a pleasant smile stretched on my face.  
  
~  
  
Well? How'd you like it? This took me a while to come out with. I know that others are waiting for me to update Broken and Dancing in the Dark, but I have a conviction set for myself to try and add a new chapter to every story before starting one for another. And because I haven't updated this one, I've been working on it. Well, I know it isn't the best, and I originally was going to give a little more to help you guess who the victim was, but I found some problems and had to change that.  
  
Anywho, I hope you all enjoyed it. But it's sad because I'm starting to run out of insults and find myself repeating a lot of them. I ask that you forgive me for this. -_-. . . But I have to use ones that don't give away the sex of a character. So, if I get a little repetetive with those, please forgive me.  
  
Well, I can tell you now, after reading some reviews, some of you are right, and some of you are wrong on the victims. But all in all, some have definitely guessed who the murderer is. But it's weird, nobody's really guessed who the victim is. Ah well. -_-. .  
  
ONCE AGAIN!, thanks for reading this and I hope you'll be so kind as to review either with a guess, compliments, or even flames. But the thing is, if you flame me, please tell me what I'm doing wrong. I appreciate that because I like to improve them, not just feel bad about them. Thanks a bunch. ^_^  
  
Until next time,  
  
Ciao. ^_~ 


	5. Slit

Half of What I Used to Be  
  
Shadow Knight  
  
Chapter 5: Slit  
  
Disclaimer: No ownership to it. . .sigh. .  
  
~  
  
NOTE: Sorry, I haven't updated in so long. Been REALLY busy lately. Whoo! Projects suck, unless their fun. :P Anywho, in this chapter I'm gonna reveal a LOT of characters who get knocked off (NOT KILLED). Kind of minor ones, but look for the clues. I'll try to make them apparent. . or subtle. ^_^  
  
P.S. There's an only a few of you who are on the right track! Most of you are guessing the wrong person. Hopefully I'll find a way to get you on back track. But, if I'm confusing you or throwing you off. . . well. . .I'm sorry. I'll try harder to make it a bit more clear.  
  
Hope you enjoy it.  
  
~  
  
It was strangely quiet today.  
  
The quiet that resonated through the town wasn't the kind that I normally enjoyed. It wasn't peaceful or just full of small whispers.  
  
It was. . . just too quiet.  
  
Too damn quiet. . . .  
  
As I sat in my room, the silence deafened me and threatened to swallow me in its mute maw. How I hated this silence! I _hated_ it. My hands shook and rose to my head automatically, as if trying to quell my suffering. They burrowed themselves like small creatures, trying to hide from the light in my thick hair.  
  
They didn't like this silence either. . .  
  
I looked outside through the window. Shit. . .it was still bright outside. For some reason, something told me not to go outside. It was dangerous. They'd catch me if I did.  
  
Yes. . . they'd catch me. . .  
  
Oh! But _something_ had to be done. The pain was pulsating in my brain now, eating chunks of fleshy material.  
  
I could feel it.  
  
Burn. . .Burn. . Burned! Oh how it burned! My skin burned and something swam beneath it. Worms. . . worms. . hellish worms were crawling, wreathing and slithering like dirty parasites. . . Yes. . . filthy, nasty things were. . . yes. . they were try to consume me!  
  
They were here to make me suffer for my sins.  
  
But no. . . I wouldn't let them! I jumped up and grabbed a pencil from the table beside me.. Bringing it to my skin I nearly screamed with triumph.  
  
"Die, you damned demons! Perish you venomous brood!" I hissed between clenched teeth.  
  
I drove it deep into the flesh of my arm, almost screaming at the sudden mix of pain and satisfaction. Oh. . . . how red it was. . . my blood. But wait. . . what is that? I watched as a thin, black line wriggled from the flowering wound on my arm and floundered downward. With fascination I stared as it wiggled to my hand and wrapped around my fingers.  
  
How odd. . . .  
  
Suddenly. . . there were more. They began to crawl and writhe, spawning from a million pores. What was this? Were these the little demons that plagued me, flaming inside me and eating me flesh?  
  
There were so many. . . .  
  
Soon my arm was covered in the wriggling mass. My arm was ebony in an encasement of them. The blood from my bubbling wound was ignored as it slid down my elbows like small snakes.  
  
"Get out. . ."  
  
They kept pouring out. . . they kept coming. . . these little plagues.  
  
"All of you. . . get. . . get out!"  
  
I began scratching at my arm in a frantic attempt to rip them out faster. My fingers plucked at the flowering petals of pinkish flesh. A pleasurable sigh flew from my lips, as my arm convulsed at the prodding of my fingers.  
  
"You devils. . . get out of my flesh! Stop your torment! I'll have none of it anymore!"  
  
My exclamations were getting louder and fiercer with every jab into my arm. A spasm of euphoria shot up through me like a drug or erotic experience.  
  
"Yes. . that's it. . . I'll kill you all. ."  
  
Suddenly a loud noise boomed from outside. I jerked away from my arm and froze. Oh how my heart beat madly! Like a thousand drummers thumping away at the thin skin of my chest it was!  
  
It felt like it was about to burst from my ribs!  
  
"Master! Please come back! Don't throw any more bombs. . .please!"  
  
The sniveling voice drew me to the window with a frown, my previous pleasure deadened. There ran another fool, his mustache quivering as an on set of tears filled eyes.  
  
Oh how I hated them all. This town. . . I would have to leave soon. It was grating on my brain.  
  
Looking down at my arm, I noticed that I only saw the pale flesh of my arm. So. . . they little demons had escaped during my distraction? No matter. . .  
  
Grabbing a cloth, I clamped down on the puckered edges of my wound, shutting off the source of the rivulets of blood running down my forearm. Watching the stain flower in the towel, a sneer grew on my face as I thought of the citizens of the town.  
  
"Damn them all."  
  
~  
  
The electric light ahead flickered uncertainly as if deciding to hold its light for a sinner. . .  
  
A sinner like me. . .  
  
I grinned as I walked under the sheet of darkness beneath the lamp.  
  
How wonderful the night was! I reveled in it! Foolish. . . so very foolish I had been when I slept during these long hours into the night! How could no one else realize the wonderful beauty of the ebony shades of darkness?  
  
No matter. . . I thought to myself. . . the more for me.  
  
I didn't know where I was going, I just had to get out. Confined in a small room was beginning to cause those little monsters to appear faster. Out here. . . there were none that burned inside me.  
  
Suddenly a blur passed my vision, but I recognized the voice.  
  
"Oh how I love all the silks of the world."  
  
The bastard hopped by me, not even noticing as I fell into shadow. Yes. . . I had become quite accustomed with my friend of the night. I was truly invisible now. . .  
  
Something fell from his bulging sack at my feet. My friend of shadow seemed bewildered at it and fled quickly. The light decided to betray me and flicker on nearby.  
  
A pair of underwear sat at my feet.  
  
"Come back here you nasty monster you!"  
  
Looking above, I saw a figure leap over the fence behind me and looking down, spot me.  
  
"You! It was you, wasn't it?!"  
  
I watched the figure land into the pool of light. My eyes narrowed. Why?! Why did I keep running into fools?!  
  
Sooner or later. . . one of them is going to have to suffer. . .  
  
"So, you common peasant, what right do you think you have to commit such a crime?! You despicable lowly creature! You need to be punished!"  
  
A sudden instrument appeared in the idiot's hand. It whirled lightly and tumbled to the ground like a fallen piece of lace. Slithering across the ground like a snake, it twirled.  
  
"Now you'll know the consequences for your crime!"  
  
The ribbon suddenly came to life and sprung at me like a viper, the forked tongue lashing toward my face.  
  
But the little shit was too slow.  
  
It fell behind me as I moved like water, rushing toward the scared face before me. Yes! How I moved with liquid grace as I clasped at that pale neck!  
  
The ribbon fell from limp fingers as my hand clasped tighter around that pretty little neck. The fool scratched at my hand until it was jagged with red. I only smiled at the exhausted breaths that ushered from those pale lips.  
  
"P. . .P. . Pleas. . . Please. . . le. .t. . me. . . go."  
  
I felt my lips stretch across my teeth. Leaning close to the dark locks I whispered, "No."  
  
Giving a tight squeeze on the neck, I threw down the fool and drew a knife from my pocket.  
  
Oh. . . how I loved to carry around knives these days. . . .  
  
"Now. . . stay still. . ."  
  
I saw the pupils widen and it fascinated me on how they could grow so large in such small eyes. Before my victim could leap away, I jumped and planted my knees on the pale arms and forced the idiot to stay still. Grabbing that frightened face, I smiled.  
  
"You know. . you were only getting in the way. . . You should have expected this sooner or later."  
  
Gaining some breath back, the little bastard was about to scream before I punched at the dip of the throat. Now only gasps could be heard.  
  
"First though. . . this tongue has got to go. . . Yes. ."  
  
I brought my knife down and grabbed the waggling tongue. Then I brought my knife down just as I heard a scream begin to erupt from the throat and I-  
  
And I woke up.  
  
Looking around, I noticed that I was sitting on my bed, staring at the wall. Had I fallen asleep? No. . . my eyes felt dry as I blinked, issuing some tears to lubricate them.  
  
It was all a dream?  
  
Turning, I looked out the window and watched as the people passed by, minding their own business. Had they suddenly forgotten about the murder? About the body they had found? About the fact that murderer still hadn't been found?  
  
How stupid these people were!  
  
I lifted my hand to wrench at my hair in frustration and annoyance when I suddenly noticed what I was holding.  
  
A knife.  
  
Deep crimson had settled to a darker shade on the blade.  
  
My lips grew thin against my teeth as my face contorted into a grin.  
  
Maybe it wasn't a dream. . .  
  
~  
  
OKAY! I'M DONE FOR THIS CHAPTER!  
  
WHOO!  
  
That was starting to seriously FREAK ME OUT. Did it scare you guys at all? Or no. I hope it did a little bit. That's kind of what I'm aiming for besides the mystery.  
  
Okay, on to business: I know I haven't updated in a LONG time and I apologize. And for all you readers who continue to read this whacked out piece of crap, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I mean it. I really appreciate all comments and encouragements. Even a criticism or two. :P  
  
Anywho, as for what I mentioned prior, about A LOT of people being exposed. . . well. . it was only 4 really. Two of them are REALLY subtle hints because I'm trying to knock of suspects faster now so this wont turn out super long. ALSO! Just incase you are wondering about that last scene, just wait until the NEXT chapter and it will be EXPLAINED. I promise. ^_^  
  
Hmm. . . I think that's about it.  
  
Good luck guessing you guys. Some of you are SOOOO off. ^_^ But, probably for good reason. The next chapter will knock a lot of suspects off the list as well and by then you'll probably DEFINITELY know who it is. If you don't, then, I'll post something on the last chapter explaining any questions and such. I estimate this should be done in 2, maybe 3 chapters at max.  
  
Until then,  
  
Ciao. ^_~  
  
P.S. Awesome analytical skills (now I'm not saying you're right or wrong) on the story: Wrym, Final Fan, and wadeva2390, and Tyrean.  
  
P.P.S. _roq_: You may want to reconsider your answer. 


	6. Flesh

Half of What I Used to Be

Shadow Knight

Chapter 6: Flesh

Disclaimer: Nope. . .I do not own it.

-/-

They were getting closer. . . .I could tell. My blood was burbling inside me with excitement. Yet, as I glared down the street my fingers felt tense with an unnerving fear. I couldn't explain it, but it scratched at my insides in pursuit of something unseen.

I had seen it on TV today as I was walking by an electronic warehouse. A lady with a long, slender, bundle at her shoulder moved and I caught sight of the television. They had said the "victim was torn to shreds" when they found the body. The victim was "speechless due to a severed tongue" and was found "whimpering." I felt a pride in seeing my work spoken with such awe across the city. They should now know they weren't dealing with a lunatic. No, . . . no. . . I was much more sophisticated than that. I didn't kill randomly. . . no. . . I had a purpose for it all. . . The blood that burned on my hands had been payment for their annoyances.

I would make them pay. . . yes. . . anyone who stepped in my path would be dead the next morning. A bubble of laughter popped at my lips. I would show them all! Yes. . .yes. . .Yes!

A flash of metal suddenly caught my eye. A shudder passed through me uncontrollably. I wasn't sure if it was from fear or delight. The feeling persisted as the source of my unidentified shiver came into full view. My teeth chattered, my lips quivered, and my eyes rolled back and forth. How violently this tremor shook me! My eyes screwed downward from the sky back to the figure on the street.

How the sight of these people I knew made me tremble! I wanted to claw at my eyes to destroy the sights I saw! Then I would never have this fear again! . . . . was it fear? Or was it anger? As I pondered, half distracted, I failed to notice that the sneaky creep had come closer. My teeth gnawed subconsciously at my lips as I thought.

"Hello."

As I heard the voice break through my thought, I jumped and felt my teeth sink deep into my bottom lip. A spasm ran through my face as I tried to quell the urge to yelp at the sudden pain. Turning baleful eyes toward the cause of my pain, I let a small, "Hello," slip past my bleeding lips.

Unfortunately, it didn't go unnoticed.

"Are you okay? It looks like your lips are bleeding." The voice grated on my ears and I could hear. . . yes, I swear I could hear it!. . . the vindictive glee cleverly disguised with concern!. . . It made me sick, like maggots eating away my insides in the pit of my belly.

I sucked my bottom lip, swallowing some blood. How bitter it tasted. . . it seemed poisoned and tainted. . . yes. . . so dirty. . . so nasty. . . so bad. . . .

"Hey, did you hear me?"

I jerked from my reverie and put on the best smile I could. It ended lopsidedly. "Yes. . . I. . . I. . . was just startled."

How those eyes tried to see through me! But no, I would be opaque to those evil, seeking eyes! They would not see the blood that tainted my hands. I slowly slid my hands behind me. . .there! there! I saw those eyes doing it again! Trying to see through me again! "I. . . I must be going. Good-bye."

I turned. If only I could escape this hell I would never do anything bad again! I picked up my pace and tried to escape the demon that waited at my heels, trying to pick my guise apart. So dirty. .. dirty. . .yes. . .filthy were my hands that I had to hide them. . . Or else they would see them. . . dirty. . . dirty. . . .

"Are you afraid?"

A cold chill ran up my spine. I stopped and turned. I hate you! HATE YOU. I wanted to scream it at the figure before me. How had I been figured out?! How? Maybe. . . maybe if we just slipped into a dark alley, I could just. . . perhaps. . . no. . . but I have to. . . yes. . . no!. . . I looked up with veiled fear at the person before me.

"I just thought you might be scared with this murder on the loose. You looked kind of nervous and in a hurry. . so I . . . thought maybe. . . you know. . ."

My breathing stopped for a moment. This was the time I had to pick whether I left a corpse, or living person. I knew that those eyes were trying to perceive some hidden truth! But, they would leave with nothing! "Just a little bit, I suppose," I mumbled, trying to swallow the anger in my throat.

"Oh. Well, I'll see you later. Bye."

My heart began to beat madly. Oh how it beat! It felt like a beast that had been held from its meal for so long had been freed at last, thundering in my chest. Ha! The little demon had not discovered anything! I knew that a frown of disappointment had lit that face, but no, I had conquered! Watching the figure pass down the street, I hid myself in the shadows. I licked my bloody lip in displeasure. I should have done it. . . that pseudo caring act was annoying.

I looked back again. As the source of my irritation walked in the sun, I was suddenly blinded. I felt infuriated! The monster did that on purpose! I knew it! Standing at that angle in the sun, the metal had gleamed like a hideous grin and burned my eyes. Damn it damn it damn it damn it!!

No. . . I. . I had to control myself. . must maintain control. . . yes. . . calmness first . . .I stared up at the sky, watching nothing. This hate was getting more intense. I had to get out of here soon.

I slipped my hand through my hair lightly. But no, I still had some business to do. Yes. . . much more business to do. . .

-/-/-/-/-

I looked at the clock's frozen face.

1: 13

It gleamed brightly in the night against the dark building. Yes, everything was dark, so splendidly dark. . . As dark as my soul, yes. . . my dark, dark soul. . . stained by so much blood.

The silence was broken by my laugh.

How it echoed into the night! Powerful and bold. There was nothing to be scared of! I was invincible. A fiery passion burned through me at the thought. . . I would never be conquered. No, never again! Suddenly, I heard a quiet sobbing. How ugly the noise was! Yet. . . it interested me. I needed to know the source. There was nothing else interesting in this forsaken place. . .

I made my way to the noise, in the elusive darkness seeping. . .pouring into every fiber within me. I was not to be seen or heard. The darkness was part of me, as I was part of it. Quiet. . . yes. . . ever so quiet. I was unable to be heard. . . unable to be seen. . . . yes. . .

The buildings watched me. . . yes! I knew how they stared. . . wanting to reach out and rip my heart out. . . . .I knew only too well. . . but I wouldn't let them. . . I wouldn't let anyone! Step. . . step. . . step. . . yes,. . . closer now. . . closer to that awful wailing, like the last screams of a dying cat. . . . Annoying,. . . . yet. . . the pain was divine to my ears, luring me closer. . . .

The music!. . . it was close!. . . I could hear it. . . yes, just over that wall. I peaked over the wall. . yes. . .so quietly. . . I saw someone sitting on the roof. . . creating the symphony that had hit my ears. . . My teeth gnashed. . . oh how they gnashed! My mind rocked back and forth between hatred and joy for this grating masterpiece. Yet. . . I watched. . . watched like a snake.

A sniffle. .. a wail. . . it grew bothersome after a bit. Now screams. . . yes. . . that's more like it. Just thinking about it. . oh yes. . . . it stirs my blood and makes my body light on fire! But no. . . I was now just listening to crying. . .stupid, stupid crying. I wanted to make it stop. . .yes. . .

That little annoyance was just waiting for a quick stroke with a blade. Something quick to end the broken singing. Just as I was about to strike, another figure jumped onto the roof. As the light hit this new person, I felt a shudder pass through me. . . Oh how I shook! Trembled. . .screamed inside!. . .

Blood. . . blood. . . it rushed to my face and pounded against the thin, stretched skin of my face. My temples pulsed with the wild beat of my heart as I stared, stared at the source of my ire and anger. Oh how it burned within me! Ruled and threatened to destroy me!

I clutched at my face, attempting to control my frenzied breathing. I watched, restraining myself from attacking the bastard as he awkwardly wrapped his arms around the sobbing, annoyance. I stressed my ears, trying to hear what the idiot was saying to the sniveling mess.

"I'm. . . I'm so sorry. I know I can never truly understand but. . . I just want you to know that I'm here for you and no matter what. . . I'll always listen. . . I may not be the best listener in the world but. .. I'll try my best."

I felt bile rising in my throat. This made my gut burble. . . this was disgusting. I couldn't take any more of this.

"Thank you-"

I let my body pool off the fence and slither to the ground. How false their promises were! How cold and manipulative their eyes were. My belly curled and I felt spasms rising through my frame, making me silently convulse. Dry heaves shook my body until I finally felt burning acid spill past my lips. I fell to my knees as another spasm took hold of me. I kneeled there, watching the slick pool slide down a crack in the pavement.

All the impurities. . . yes. . .all the sickness and weakness that had been staining my body with such black marks. . . yes. . .they were all gone now. . . A few drops slid along my wet lips. . . This surely was a sign of the weaknesses leaving me. . . yes. . yes! It had to be!

I quickly wiped my mouth and smiled. I was ready to tell my secret. . . yes. . .to the person I had done all this for. . . Finally! The time had come!

-/-/-/-

"Can I help you?"

My bones grew stiff and tight. With an aching pain, I craned my neck to look behind me. The face staring at me may have seemed innocent, but I could see the dark malevolence behind it. . . yes. .. everyone was trying to catch me. . . I would not let them!

"No! . . No. . .I'm.. . . I'm fine."

Wait. . . this one seemed familiar somehow. . . I knew this one. . from. . . somewhere. . .

"I'm sorry, but you don't look like you are all right. You have smears of vomit and. . .I believe. . blood on your shirt. If you come inside, I can get you a clean set of clothes and see if I can help you in any way," I watched the hand come closer to me, wanting to clutch at me and pull me in.

Ah! This was the one who had gotten in the way those few times in the past. I wouldn't let that happen again. . . I needed to get away. . . .

"N. . No. . I'm fine. . .I. . I'll just be going. .," How the hand made me shiver! Trying to pull me into that cursed prison.. . .

I watched the brow furrow and a frown dim the once "helpful" and "concerned" face. The look in those eyes. . . I could see that my secret wasn't hidden anymore. . . This was not good. . . no. . . not good at all. . . . I had to get away before all was ruined!

"I insist. It would be of no trouble. I would actually prefer that you come in. I don't want you getting sick or anything. Come, come," Suddenly the hand grabbed my forearm.

But how it burned! Those fingertips seared into my flesh! They tasted sensed the sins tainting my once innocent flesh and gripped harder. I must get away, away, away, away! A beast suddenly blossomed within my chest. . . yes. . a beast of new beginnings!

A rush filled me as I turned toward the demon clutching my arm, trying to drag me into a hellish prison. There was only one way to deal with such maggots.

A friendly smile pulled my lips from my teeth. I turned and faced the devil. "Yes. . . .I believe I will come with you. . . . Show me the way."

There was a confused look that passed along the idiots face for a moment before the hand slowly released my arm and pointed to a door. "This way. . ."

I followed the fool's footsteps. As the door shut out the last rays of the street lights, I withdrew my blade from behind my back. . . . .

The hopeless fool never saw it coming.

-/-/-/-/-/-

Okay, I know that was really short and not worthy for not having been updated in so long, but I really have a good excuse this time!!! I PROMISE!!! My schedule has been absolutely haywire lately. I've just needed time to straighten things out. But, hopefully, if all goes well, I'll be able to work on my stories a lot more.

Anywho, with this chapter, the last is next!!!! So, after the next chapter, you better have your guess for the murder and victim in mind. A lot of you are doing well, but you're missing some vitals. Yet, all will be (hopefully) cleared up in the next chap. I revealed. . . well. . . let's see. . . 5 characters in this one. Yup, 5. So far 10 have been cleared off the suspect/victim list. Let's see if you can guess who.

'till next time,

Ciao. :P

P.S. PLEASE REVIEW, I really enjoy reading your speculations. A lot of you guys are really good at this! Starting to scare because some of you are getting so close!!!

P.P.S. As for my other stories, I will try my best to update Dancing in the Dark, and Broken. DitD I'm working on now, but Broken. . . well. . .it might take a bit. I'm in a bit of jam at the moment. But I've got everything laid out, so don't worry. Thank you all who have been continuing to egg me on to continue. I'll try my best


	7. Nightmare

Half of What I Used to Be

Shadow Knight

Chapter 7: Nightmare

Disclaimer: Nope, no ownership. Belongs to the ingenious Rumiko Takahashi

Drip. . . .

Drip. . . .

I watched the warm drops slide along the metal surface. . . . I wonder. . .

Drip. . . .

Propping the blade above my face, I closed my eyes and stuck my tongue out.

Drip. . . .

Mmmm. . . tasted sweet. It was like sticking my tongue out for gumdrops when it rained. But not nearly as tasty.

Licking my lips, I looked down at the body on the floor. It writhed and shook a bit before it finally stayed still. A lake of crimson engulfed the ground around the carcass, seeping around the snapped limbs. Reaching down, I let my fingers swirl about in the pool. Bringing my fingers to my lips, I licked some off slowly.

How exquisite. Sweeter than I had ever imagined. Much sweeter.

I looked at the clock nearby. Oh my, time to go. I cast a quick glance to the right. A beast glared back at me, cautious and weary, scarlet dropping from its grinning lips. The eyes flickered, pupils small and indiscreet in the pool of the iris. Reaching a hand out to the beast, my bloody fingers streaked against the image before I realized that it was. . . a mirror.

A truly terrifying beast, hungry for flesh.

I shuddered as I saw the beast. . .the creature. . . laugh at me. As I turned away from the mirror, a shiver ran down my spine.

"Don't you dare turn away from me you piece of shit."

My hands convulsed at my sides. I quickly spun around, my knife in hand, hissing out, half wild and half scared, "Who said that?!"

"Me," came the caustic reply.

I turned, and my hand went limp, the knife clacking to the ground below me. I shook and edged myself closer. I stared at the cruel eyes, dark and smoldering. Was I seeing right? Was this-

"That's right. . . I'm. . . . you."

There was a face. . . . . sneering at me. . . . from a mirror.

My fingers shook. That wasn't me! That couldn't be my face!!! Those cold eyes. . . no. . no!!! That was not me! It looked like a melted image of myself, twisted and distorted from all reality. The skin seemed to melt and reform at a second's passing. Unwillingly, I reached out and let my fingers stray against the cold glass surface. I shivered and jerked away as if burned.

It had felt like flesh under my touch. . .

As I tried to maintain my shivering, I had looked down. Now as I looked up, I felt a scream of terror rip past my lips.

The person was crawling. . . crawling out of the mirror.

I jerked backwards, away from the smiling creature. This creature with my face. I stumbled suddenly and fell backwards. My breath escaped me as I hit the ground roughly. Coughing spasmodically, I fervently tried to ease myself from the pool I had slipped in. Crimson stained my hands and splashed in thick waves. I looked up quickly to see the creature had completely climbed out of the mirror. . . . and it was slowly dragging itself toward me.

"S-s-Stay back!" I brought my knife toward the thing crawling, reaching out for my feet.

"Didn't you want power? Didn't you want strength to cut down all those you despise? All those that made us feel weak before?" A wet hissing issued from those cruel black lips.

Suddenly a slimy hand clasped my ankle, dragging itself closer. I slashed, hacked and ripped feverishly away at that abominable hand. But it was no use. Nothing affected it. I tried to stand but the creature had dragged itself half way up my torso, the black eyes boring into mine.

"I can help you. We can beat them all. You know that! Deep down, you know that I'm the only way. . . I've always been here, waiting for you to approach me. And now you cringe! Such insolence! Say the word and we can kill any person who gets in our way, and we can obtain anything. . ."

My neck felt swollen and thick as I tried to gasp for breath. Were the slick hands on my neck, or could I just not breathe? I couldn't decide. My body felt paralyzed and cold as the scarlet beneath me soaked my clothes and caked my hair.

Suddenly the lips turned into a frown, a deep, deep frown that spoke of evils I had not even dreamed of. "If you don't, you can die, worthless and alone in a pool of your own blood. . . or this one. I don't care. Either way, you'll be humiliated and broken."

The smile reappeared, a pseudo look of caring crossing the melting face. "Come on. Just let me take over for a while. Everything you ever dreamed of will be yours."

I looked at the dark eyes as the last of my oxygen was squeezed from my lungs. I knew that if I refused, I'd die here on the spot. Grimly, with the last of my breath, I managed to breathe out a small, "yes."

The evil creature smiled darkly and I lost consciousness.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

A flickering light seared through my closed lids and forced me awake. I rose a hand to block it out, but it continued to blink erratically.

Suddenly, an anger overtook me. A blinding rage. What was this?! With the new found energy coursing, bursting, pumping in my veins I rose up and threw a fist toward the incessant light. In a burst of light, glass shattered and rained down on my head. I gave a small fit of pleasurable screams.

How exhilarating! I felt on top of the world. Nothing was left for me to conquer! There was no one. This power. . . this slow starving madness. . . had caught up with me and left me empowered.

My skin seemed to tremble and I looked about. I had moved. . . . I don't remember how I had gotten here. The last time I had been awake was at that bastard's place where I had encountered the sickening creature that granted me this power.

I dusted myself off and brushed some broken pieces of glass from my shoulder. I suddenly froze when I saw a person rush past in front of me. A look of irritation passed my face. I had seen that black and yellow bandanna before. The beast within me craved for more blood, but I held the creature back.

I had more important things to do.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

I was finally here. After a night out, I was back. I could finally leave this wretched town, my victories and my last conquest waiting to be taken held of. I smiled and pushed open the door.

Only the sound of running water filled the air as I stepped inside. I walked quietly to the source of the water. My eyes roamed quickly about, surveying every detail about the room. Quiet. . . . empty. . . no witnesses. . .

There. . . there was my last conquest. Washing a large amount of dishes, the pale hands worked efficiently and mindlessly. I stepped silently behind this treasure. "Hello," I spoke with gentleness in my voice I didn't recognize.

A gasp permeated the silence between us. The plate in the pale hands dropped to the bottom of the sink and sunk beneath a tomb of foam. The water shut off and a shiver shook the body in front of me. Whipping around, two dark eyes looked at me with flickering emotions: hate, disgust, wonder,. . . but most of all. . . .fear.

"What are you doing here?"

The voice sounded sweet, cleansing a small part within me. I suppose it was my heart. I sighed and stepped closer. "I only came to say hello. No need to be. . . frightened."

The eyes narrowed and glared. "I'm not scared. Especially of you! You just startled me with your quiet entrance. . . I didn't notice you had come in. . . . Different from your normal noisy clamoring."

I smiled tersely. How we danced around this subject so much. "You know. . . there's been something I've wanted to tell you for some time now."

"W. . . What is that?" How defensive my little prize was!

I slid closer. "I wanted to tell you. . . . I love you."

The look of surprise made me laugh. I reached out to my love. The look of surprise was violently killed and replaced by an almighty fear. My love backed away, bumping against the sink. I looked inquisitively. "What makes you fear me so much, my love?"

"Y-y-Your hands are blood red!. . . They're covered in blood!"

I looked down to my outstretched hands. Indeed, they were still stained red from my last. . .encounter. I smiled and wiped my hands calmly on my clothes. Strange. . . . it didn't come off. The blood must have dried and dyed my hands. I shrugged. No big deal.

"It's of no real consequence," I spoke calmly, closing the gap between us.

Looking at me with unbelief, a half scream passed by the quivering lips, "No real consequence?! What are you talking about?! There's blood on your hands! Blood!"

"They were just obstacles in my way. . . they were asking to die."

The statement was blank. I felt nothing behind it except a bit of pride. But it had quiet the opposite on the one in front of me. A convulsion shook the tiny body so much. I heard a struggle for breath in that pale throat. Those same pale hands that had moved like graceful butterflies before, shook and quivered as they held back a spasm of vomit.

"Don't be scared, my love. . . . No one will find out it was me. We can run away from this wretched town now. I will be yours, and you will be mine. ."

Suddenly the fear dissolved at my last words. Anger, born from stubbornness of years, broke through and ran rampant on the beautiful face. "I will never be yours. I belong to nobody. Especially a disgusting sicko like you. Get away from me!" A hand was planted in my chest, forcing me back roughly.

The anger and hate in the voice made me shake. My love. . . had rejected me? And what was this violence shoved my way?

No. . . this couldn't be right. This wasn't the way it was supposed to be.

I stepped closer and grabbed my love gently. Some struggling ensued. I was growing frustrated with this behavior. I squeezed the squirming mass in my arms tightly for a moment. A small yelp of pain burst forth. I relaxed my grip a little and felt a small euphoric sigh escape from my lips. But no. . . . no. . . I wouldn't hurt my love. No, no. . . .

"You must understand my love," I whispered gently into the small ear, "I love you. I just want you to understand that. I want to be with you forever. Forever. . . . can't you do just that?"

The fighting grew worse and a sharp retort bit back like acid, scalding my insides, "You bastard! Get your filthy hands off me! Don't touch me you psychotic murderer!"

I felt an anger broil through me, firing at every nerve in my brain. It picked and scratched. It hurt so much. Why did it hurt so much? I didn't like this, it hurt so badly! My eyes turned toward the struggling figure in my arms, the pain in my head increased until I was squinting. I wanted to fall over and die, it hurt so much!

"I'm NOT psychotic. I did all I did, murdered all of them for a reason! I did everything for you. I wouldn't let those pigs get in the way of our love. Can't you see I did it all for you?! That I killed for you?!" I screamed at the shaking bundle of limbs, my voice cracking and high.

My words fell on deft ears as the struggling only grew worse. A sudden madness possessed me, a devil!, a darkness! The undying love I had felt for so long wilted before the power of the beast inside me. I didn't resist it though. I wished for it to consume me until it filled ever part of my being.

My lips pulled back over my lips in a snarl, disrupted with a moan of satisfaction as the madness rushed through me, eating into my brain like a million worms. I felt an ineffable power surge into my limbs, everything becoming clear as I stared down at the source from which this power was born.

Everything was clear now! I saw everything as it was supposed to be! The love that had blinded me before was diminished and flushed out from my mind. Only fury burned like the flames of the underworld, fueled by the undying hatred I had for this insignificant person. . . . That was it! I peered down with my new found sight and saw that everything I had ever loved, cherished, and obsessed after was only a pest, nothing to be sought after. . . . What a fool I had been!

Feeling angered even more at such my stupid pursuit of this worthless idiot, I smacked the worthless scum away. "I was wrong about you. . . oh yes. . . . I was so wrong. You aren't worth my time. I wasted years of my life on you. . . and for what? NOTHING!"

A knife suddenly appeared in my hand. I turned and smiled. "Naughty, naughty," I chastised to my hand. "Nevertheless. . . . ," I quickly grabbed the knife with my right hand, "I do need a blade at the moment."

I looked down at the figure on the floor. Shaking like a child. Where had the intrepid warrior fled to now? I leaned down. The fool started to scoot back, but I was faster, the clumsy idiot. Snatching up a handful of hair, I yanked the coward back towards me. A screech filled the air, and I grinned. What music these panicked screams bring!

Looking at the handful of hair, I held my demon aside for just a moment. I brought the lavender strands to my face and breathed. A stifled moan escaped my lips and I fought the anger down for another moment longer. It was just as I imagined, smelling of jasmine and –

"Get your hands off me!"

A fist rushed by my cheek, grazing it. I slid backwards and yanked at the silken strands roughly. Another tortured scream ripped through the air. I grasped the swinging fist in mine and clenched it tightly. Breath from pale lips suddenly became tight and short as the simpering pest tried to breathe. Oh how fun this was! This was much better than I had imagined!

I enjoyed this pain much more than any silly love.

Another scream! Another note to the symphony I was about to conduct! The fist in my hand became smaller as I felt a crack splinter under the flesh and bone break jaggedly out of the skin. "Yes, scream! Scream until I hear your screams no more! I want to enjoy this moment forever!"

A laugh shook my frame. What a performance! What a sound! If only I could record it! I- The screams suddenly came short. I looked down. "Now why did you have to go and do that? You were doing so wonderfully. Shall we try an encore?"

My prey's eyes were wide and bright. As I stared more deeply into them, I saw a relief flow through my personal music box. What could be-

I was thrown off from my thoughts when a heavy object contacted with my skull. I gave a shout and fell to the ground, my head aching. I turned over, looking in front of me blearily, my teeth clenched in an angry snarl. Suddenly, the knobby end of a large stick met my vision before contacting crushingly with the side of my head.

A roar tore from my throat in rage and confusion as I was struck down once again. I put up my hands to block the assault, but the stick continued to make contact with my flesh. Blood welled up in my mouth. How bitter it tasted! It was choking me! Pain wracked my body as the barrage continued.

"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, the demon fighting to keep me strong.

The stick was relentless and continued to beat on my skull. The sound began to vibrate into my body, resonating in my ears. thump. . . thump. . . thump. . . thump. . .

It was getting louder and louder! Would this pain ever end?! The demon had left me howling in pain as I clutched at my face.

Thump. . . Thump. . . . Thump. . . Thump

So incessant! "Damn you! Stop it!"

THUMP. . . THUMP. . . THUMP. . . THUMP

The noise consumed everything about me. Even the pain began to fade as the noise reigned. What madness had fallen upon me now?! I. . . . .

. . . . . . and suddenly, my eyes fluttered open.

I was in my room. I stared about me shocked at the sight. Glancing at my hands, my eyes widened. They were not dirty! They were clean as they had been before! I shook my head and pinched my cheek. No. . . no . . . it was all real.

THUMP

That noise. . . .it still persisted. . . was I still. . . I let my curiosity take hold and I ventured out with a simple, "Yes?"

"You have a phone call. Hurry and pick it up," came the voice from the other side of the door.

As steps tottered away from my door, I stared. The voice was normal, not shaken with fear. . . . I stared down at my clothes. They were not bloody or disheveled. They were crisp and clean as they had always been. I opened the door and made my way down to the phone.

Had it all been a dream? Everything? The murders, the fear, the blood. . . . all a fabricated dream? But how did I feel such pleasure, such bliss? Such pain and misery? Pondering these thoughts, I saw that I had reached the phone. I picked it up and let my mind focus on the telephone call.

"Yes, may I help you?"

"You damn well may. You can start by paying me my money. I've waited two weeks for that money, and I'm not going to wait a day longer, you hear me?" The voice was sharp and piercing in my ear.

I winced as the reality of life had sunk in. "Yes, I hear you. I just. . . I just don't have the money right now. You must understand don't you?"

A snicker crept through the phone, making me suddenly cold. "Oh I understand perfectly. I understand about that money you've been stealing from the place. And that you've been buying other crap with it. Oh yes, I understand perfectly well about your darker side."

My body was rigid. "What do you mean," I demanded, trying not to let my voice shake.

"I've seen you on your late night excursions. I've seen you creep into you-know-who's room and watch. Oh, believe me, I know about your little act, you disgusting little pervert. I know all about it," the voice was filled with loathing.

"That's not tru-"

The voice was cold as it cut me off. Cold and heartless. "I don't give a shit whether you deny it or not. I just want my money. And if you just 'don't have any money' from your latest of 'pilfering rendezvous', then I think I'll make a trip over there and detail just what you've been doing."

I tried to resist the fear dwelling in my heart, "You have no proof."

"Oh, I've got plenty of proof. Pictures say a thousand words after all. And who wouldn't believe me? Why would I give out false information? That's not my style."

A spurt of anger spilled past my lips, "Now you just listen here!-"

"NO!, You listen here! I'm tired of waiting for my money. If you don't bring it to me tonight, I'll expose you tomorrow. I'm sure that stealing money would get you kicked out of a home, but sneaking into rooms, would surely get you booted off the island, never to see your beloved once again."

My breath stopped in my lungs. I could never see my love again? No! I couldn't do that! There was no way I could leave! My beloved was the only thing that kept me alive every day. I would have no purpose without my love. I. . . .

"I don't care what you do from now on, but bring me my money. Consider it a punishment for you filthy games. Ugh. . . you disgusting maggot! You're not a man, not even half a man! Your just a perverted beast in a human disguise. . . . tch. . .Any ways, bring me the money near the river, under the bridge tonight at 10. You know the consequences if you don't, so be there!"

The dial tone rang in my ears for a full minute before I placed it gently in its cradle. A smile grew on my face as I stood there, staring into space. My mind was whirling as thoughts raced around in my brain. Quickly, I slipped back to my room and let a small laugh escape my lips. It was an unusual laugh, filled with something I couldn't describe, yet was all too familiar at the same time.

Pausing, I reached into my sleeve, and pulled out a knife. A very unique blade that I used only when for the most special occasions. . . . Polishing the surface lightly, I murmured to myself with a wicked grin, "I may not be half the man, I was Nabiki. . . . . .

. . . . but I can still make my dreams come true."

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

THE END!!!!!. . . . OR IS IT?

Okay, so it is. :P Anwyho, glad that people still read and kept up with it. I know it took me forever. Well, did you guess who it was? If you didn't by now, I'll let you know. Ready?

. . . . . . . . . . Mousse.

Yup, the killer was Mousse the whole time. I know that transforming stuff (or non-existent really) threw a lot of people off. And to be honest, I totally forgot about that when I wrote it. I just thought it was kind of cool scene. So, that's how it ended. Still got questions? Well, I'll try to answer a few:

1-Why didn't Mousse transform when he was hit by the rain?

/Well, for one, he was dreaming the whole time. When you have dreams I suppose things like transforming really don't conflict with dreams. Sure, he could have, but would it really have mattered to him?

2-Who was the victim?

/If you didn't figure this out, it was Nabiki. I know that a lot of people thought it wouldn't be her (though there were a few who did) because of the whole "pure and innocent soul" bit at the funeral, but wouldn't a priest say that anyways? Perhaps not, but I would hope so for the most part. Because deep down I think she cares (even if microscopically) a little bit for her sisters and others.

3-What was up with the clacking shoes at the funeral?

/Well, I know most of the martial artists (including Mousse) wear soft padded shoes or slippers, but I figured that most people at a funeral would wear nice looking and neat shoes. And I figured, most nice look shoes are such that they clack (at least with men's).

4-What was up with Mousse getting the knife out of his pocket and not his sleeve?

/Well (I say that a lot don't I?), that was kind of a screw up to be honest. I didn't want to give a dead give away either though. I mean I think EVERYONE (or just about) would know who it was then. So in a way I spoke figuratively. I suppose one can think of a pocket as in a pocket of space or such.

5-What was the creature in the mirror? Or what was that about?

/Basically throughout this whole story, Mousse is slowly turning crazy (though he certainly wont admit it!). He doesn't realize it, but sees things differently. He's paranoid and believes everyone is against him. That's why he's commonly nervous and such. The creature he sees in the mirror is an outward expression of the madness growing in him. He doesn't realize it, but he let his madness slowly eat away at his brain. So basically, it was a personification of his madness which eventually, COMPLETELY took over him.

6-Why did he kill Nabiki?

/That's basically answered at the end. He was doing bad stuff like stealing money from the restaurant and sneaking into Shampoo's room to watch her (CREEPY!!!). When Nabiki threatened him (and in his dream she did the same if you're wondering) about exposing Mousse's antics, he did the only thing possible for a desperate man: killed her. And the reason why Kasumi acted normally was because she didn't know her sister was dead then. They found out that night/next day.

7-So what happens in the end, after the dream?

/Since his whole "killing spree" was a dream, he might do it and know what to do right this time. It's really up to you. Personally I'd hope he'd find some way to give Nabiki the money and stop stealing and being plain creepy. --

LIST OF SUSPECTS SCRATCHED OFF LIST (in order of appearance):

-Kasumi (buying veggies at the market)

-Hikaru (driving doll to tree-pining for Akane to come to him for comfort)

-Kuno (drops bokken on coffin-thanks her 4 the pics; & respects her for being able to get his money, in a way)

-Soun (Running after Happosai-mustached man)

-Happosai (Bombing place and steals Kodachi's undies)

-Kodachi (Accuses Mousse of stealing her undies)

-Nodoka (Carrying large bundle pass TV's in begging of chap)

-Ukyo (One with the "blinding piece of metal")

-Akane (Crying on roof; comforted by Ranma)

-Ranma (Comforts Akane)

-Dr. Tofu (Killed by Mousse when trying to help him out of nasty clothes)

-Ryoga (One with black and yellow bandanna)

-Shampoo (Mousse's loved one-as if you didn't know)

-Cologne (The one with the battering stick who saves Shampoo)

-Nabiki (One on the telephone threatening Mousse)

If you have any more questions or inquiries, just ask them in your review and if need be, I'll put up another chap just to answer questions about the story. Thank you all for reading this demented piece of junk. Please review and tell me how you liked the ending. Even flames are accepted. :P

HAPPY THANKSGIVING AND MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

Ciao. :o)


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